The tools

Yesterday, I was helping install built-in furniture. There were two tool boxes in the room. Originally, one was meant for power tools and the other one for everything else needed. When both boxes were opened, you couldn't tell which box was meant for what. As the day went on, it took time to dig through them to find what was needed, and I even wondered if what I was looking for existed in the box anymore. I started to wonder how much mental energy was being put into the search for what I needed. Did it add more work to the hard work we were already doing? Was it taking away from having more playful moments that would counteract the hard work?

Lately, life has felt like survival. It's waking up everyday and wondering if anything means anything anymore. I enjoy change, but it's not always easy. Transitions have a way of messing with our minds. My favorite seat in the house where I used to sit back and relax became a place of distraction on hard days. Distraction turned into a place where I wondered if I was enough. Not enough-ness turned into doing hard work to get out of that head space. Somehow, the place for me to relax and return to peace is now a place of survival and hard work. It seemed like all of the sudden I wasn't able to find peace anywhere. It is no wonder. I keep returning to a seat that has been telling me a different story than it used to. A lot like the tool boxes from yesterday. When first put together, these boxes represented opportunity. Over time, these boxes have been to different job sites. With each job, they were a little less put together at the end of the day. And the power tools are not sure which one they belong in anymore. The power tools may not know where they are going everyday, but if they return to their place, it's easier to move onto the next job. Not moving on from yesterday will keep us from being in today. If we can be in today, we will be able to celebrate its victories. It’s these daily victories that will give us the strength to keep going.This is why boundaries and staying organized are important tools for life.